Sharing is caring when it comes to bills, too

Money and manners – the etiquette of romance

Who should pay on the first date? In this age of dating apps and equality, that isn’t always an easy question to answer.

Our grandparents probably had just one date in their whole lives, and then they got married. Things are different today. Thanks to dating apps, it is now possible to arrange a rendezvous and sip on overpriced drinks on any day of the week. But who should foot the bill at the end of the night?

If you can already imagine sharing a bed with your date at some point in the future, then a good start would be to do the same with the bill. As in so many situations in life, however, communication is key. If the lady would like to pay, she should say so. If the man wants to the foot the bill himself, then he should do it. And if they want to share the bill, then that’s cool too. It shouldn’t matter whether you’re a man or a woman; after all, on same-sex dates the issue is irrelevant anyway.

In the not-too-distant past, it was taken for granted that the man would open the door for the woman, hold her chair in place for her and foot the bill. Nowadays, however, nobody is really sure what to do. And that is exactly as it should be. No one should feel compelled to accept a role that has been forced on them. Despite this, the moment when it comes to pay on a date can often be a little unpleasant.

In the past, it was logical for the man to pay on a date, as he usually earned more than the woman (that’s assuming she earned money at all). But even though the pay gap still exists, many women do not necessarily want to have everything paid for by a man. Why should they? And as a man, you of course should not feel obliged to foot the bill, either. There are many women who earn significantly more than men, but they too should not be falsely ashamed of allowing someone else to pay for them.

So, if you have enough money in your wallet, just do the charming thing and foot the bill. And if you cannot imagine shared parental duties and want to avoid giving off the wrong signals, then a shared bill is a sorrow halved. At the end of the day, money is secondary. Dates are about love and that, as we know, is priceless.

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